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Paycheques

from Blind Contour by Corbin Murdoch

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lyrics

Paycheques

Getting shit-faced with my brothers
On a sadness there’s no name for
Convinced of our own genius
Like the men that we were named for

Crane our necks to watch the violence
Turn away before the slaughter
Watch the hurricanes approaching
Name the storms after our daughter

Darling there’s a sadness I have seen
One I have been trying to avoid
But keeping down the darkness inside me
Limits my capacity for joy

Always thought I was unworthy
Left to reckon with my failures
Always thought things would be different
Once I untangled my anger

Waited to feel better
Dreamt of the hereafter
To feel the soft touch of a lover
To hear my children bray with laughter

Darling there’s a sadness I have seen
One I have been trying to explain
It’s a place where each of us have been
Still we do not dare to speak its name

Darling there’s a sadness I have seen
One I have been trying to deny
Even as its building by degree
In the spaces between you and I

It’s as if living paycheque to paycheque
Is just a game poor folk like to play
As if there is not enough justice
So some have to give theirs away

As if pleasure is something to save for
A debt to be serviced with pain
We threaten each other with losses
Never ask what we might stand to gain

Halfway down the hallway
Somebody graffitied
A list of good intentions
Numbered them like treaty

credits

from Blind Contour, released March 19, 2021
Written by Corbin Murdoch
Produced by Corbin Murdoch and Jesse Gander

Guitar and Voice- Corbin Murdoch
Organ- Jesse Gander

Engineered and Mixed by Jesse Gander at Raincity Recorders
Mastered by Alan Douches at West West Side Music

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Corbin Murdoch Vancouver, British Columbia

Corbin Murdoch is a songwriter who grew up and still lives on the unceded territory of the Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), Səl̓ílwətaʔ (Tsleil-Waututh) and xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam) Nations. He was a member of The Nautical Miles (2003-2017), with whom he released five albums. ... more

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